Some say that the economy is making it difficult to keep employees in the office, layoffs becoming a common theme in big companies across the nation. Well, here at Wpromote, we are definitely having trouble keeping employees around, but it has nothing to do with the recession and everything to do with good old fashioned bad luck. Whether it’s bangs and bruises or bacteria and viruses, it’s been a tough month for the good people working at Wpromote.
The first member of the Disabled List is Gina Perry. Our normally good-natured account executive was taken out of commission for a good part of last week due to a pretty severe knee injury. Instead of spending the week analyzing data, adjusting bid and managing paid search accounts, she had to go under the knife to repair some of the damage done to her knee by a rare skiing mishap. Gina is normally the master of the moguls, which is why it is so rare to see this Colorado-born speedster face down in the snow. I maintain that it must have been one of those genetically-mutated jumping trees that got into her way as she was navigating the slopes because, knowing Gina, there’s no way she just turned wrong and messed up her knee… no way!
Moving on to our next DL resident, we need go no further than the next office, where VP of Sales, Michael Stone continues his brutal battle with conjunctivitis, better known to some as “Pink Eye.” No one is positive how Stone ended up with this cur, but we assume he picked it up from one of the many orphans he was rescuing from any of a number of burning buildings he was saving this past weekend. Talk about “no good deed goes unpunished!” That poor guy can’t catch a break. Luckily, Stone only missed a single day due to his illness. You’ve got to respect a guy who cares about his work so much that he’s willing to put the eye comfort of his colleagues at risk in order to make it into the office!
The most recent addition to the Wpromote DL is likely the mightiest of Wpromote’s many champions. David Stelle, one of the best salesmen this side of the Mississippi and a foremost expert in the field of PPC, was recently rear-ended on the 405. Luckily, Dave’s car took the majority of the impact and Dave was left with only bruises, aches, pains and some serious soreness. He’s back in the office after only a couple of days at home, though, which suggests that he will likely survive to make more than a few more sales. When you’re carved out of marble and wrought iron like Dave, these kinds of things don’t tend to bother you too much. Had it been me in the car… well, let’s just say I’d be dictating this blog from the comfort of a full body cast from the ICU. With Dave’s Wolverine-like healing powers, though, he’ll probably be back to form before we notice how ugly that hat looks with his Wpromote shirt!
We wish you well, o warriors of Wpromote. Whereas everyone else is worrying about the mortgage crisis, the recession and the dwindling economies, we’d prefer it if you guys just kept your reddish eyes opened for oncoming cars and trees. Keep on fighting, guys; if you can stand working with a guy like me, then nothing can keep you down for long!