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Oh man! Now, that's what I call "modestly hot!"

Oh man! Now, that's what I call "modestly hot!"

Whoa, this is sure to be a popular version of the Tues News, am I right? Maybe not. After all, what’s sexy to a search marketer and what’s sexy to you (we call you guys “normies”) may not align. Still, just because Wpromote is a respected corporation doesn’t mean we can’t comment on the world of sensual goings on online.

I won’t keep you all in suspense anymore; let’s get going!

  • Apple recently dashed the hopes and dreams of aficionados of sexy imagery by banning all sexual content from the app store. Although this may come as a boon to parents and watchdog groups, this comes as terrible news both for males aged 5 to 95 as well as developers of apps that don’t actually contain sexual content but could possibly be used in conjunction with sexual content. For example: an application called Wobble allowed a user to make parts of a static image appear to wobble, as the name might suggest. Of course, the application was often used on parts of the female anatomy to liven up beach photos, but that was the choice of the user, not the creators of the app; you could also use it on a photo of Jello, if you so chose. This presents problems of hypocrisy, as MG Siegler of TechCrunch writes. Safari is probably the most popular application for viewing pornographic photos and it’s a product of Apple! Of course, Safari isn’t going anywhere–neither are apps from companies like Sports Illustrated or Playboy–and there appears to be little logic behind it. The app store is Apple’s and Apple’s alone, so it is always their decision regarding which apps to reject or accept; it’s just somewhat disheartening that the determining factors appear not to be concern for children but rather, concern for their own bottom line. [TechCrunch]
  • The Tues News is, generally, not what I would call a gossip rag, however, it’s not generally normal for the mistress of Google’s CEO to post a blog exposing their relationship (allegedly!). I should stipulate that I’m not a journalist and I don’t hang out with Eric Schmidt, so I don’t know what’s true and what’s a lie. That said, it appears that not only may this relationship be real, not only may the blog be legitimate but Schmidt may have had the blog removed altogether! Unfortunately for his alleged mistress, she went with Blogger (a Google property) to host her blog… oops! Let this be a lesson to all you scorned men and women out there: if you want to post a blog about your ex-lover, make sure that they don’t own the domain name! They may have to live with the shame of entertaining a extramarital affair but they certainly do not have to host your website! [Valleywag]
  • What could be steamier and sexier than sultry online content or a scandalous fling? Well, how about getting a voyeuristic look at what’s hidden behind the clothes of… Google’s search supremacy? Oh yeah, now that’s what I’m talking about! I told you our tastes were probably different! Anyway, Wired.com wrote an excellent piece about why Google’s search algorithm came to dominate the Internet in the manner that has for the last several years. Perhaps unsurprisingly, the answer seems to be a combination of attention to detail, commitment to innovation, dedicated computing resources and a little bit of luck! Oh Google, you really know how to get me going! [Wired.com]

I assume that everyone is now going to need a long, cold shower after reading those three salacious stories. I know I do! Well, I won’t hold either of us up any longer. Thanks for stopping by. Read up on and keep up with the online world; keep reading Tues News! Catch ya later!


4 thoughts on “Tues News: 2/23 (Sexy Edition)
  1. Amanda Moshier says:

    “They may have to live with the shame of entertaining a extramarital affair but they certainly do not have to host your website!” I’m dying. Thanks for the laughter this morning. Good post 🙂

  2. Jesse says:

    I need a cold shower after this blog post.

  3. Becca says:

    Ha! Pretty damn sexy 😀

  4. Andrew says:

    Since when was Google the supreme search engine? I use ask.com, way better.

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