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The election is over, Barack is gearing up to lead the nation, and the media is having a field day with the highly-anticipated (?) comeback of Ms. Spears.

Still, this doesn’t mean we should ignore the cold, hard reality: the holidays are here.

Last-minute holiday shopping is rarely fun, but when shopping for someone “special” (read: different, unique, bizarre, artistic, creative, annoying, weird), it can be nearly impossible to find a decent gift (assuming you care about such things) – and these artist types are the last ones you want to piss off. Just ask my boss.

The good news? If you resolve to get your holiday shopping done early, you may actually get to enjoy yourself at this year’s soirees, without having to worry about the shopping you still need to do or the gift you’ll never find.

Let the games begin

If you’re shopping for regular folks, consult this Black Friday post by fellow blogger and Wpromoter extraordinaire, Christian, for a great list of sites to do your holiday shopping from the comfort of home. Still, if you’re not sure what to buy that eccentric aunt, particular parent, or kooky cousin, you may need to go the extra mile…hence this post. In keeping with the holiday spirit (and taking a break from the usual online marketing-related fare), please read on for 7 gift ideas sure to satisfy even the most particular of people.

1) For the hopelessly un-hipA subscription to KCRW

There’s nothing wrong with false hope, and yes, there is such a thing, no matter what Obama says. Get your uncool relative a KCRW subscription and you’ll be doing a good thing. He or she will get the chance (however overdue) to experience some culture (and save on cool stuff with the Fringe Benefits card). You get to support an indie radio station and Southern California icon. Yay.

2) For the perpetually confused – Yes/No Pillowcases (Set of 2) from Lazybone

Some questions don’t have answers. For all others, there are Yes/No pillowcases. Gift these to that odd ball uncle who can’t seem to make up his mind, about anything. Or that flighty niece who changes her boyfriend as often as she changes her…you get it. These pillowcases rock.

3) For the eternal cynic – Bullshit Button courtesy of the Random Shop UK

Tired of that meddling aunt who never fails to rain on your parade? Not to fear, the Bullshit Button is here. Give your most cynical relative this bright red toy and tell him or her to punch it anytime the urge to interrupt your conversation with a well-meaning “FYI” surfaces. Problem solved.

4)  For the obsessive dog-lover
Pet Umbrella from Global Pet Products

It’s scary when people love their pets more than their spouse, but you and I both know these people exist. Excite their special love for four-legged, furry friends with this snazzy Pet Umbrella. Don’t expect a ‘Thank you’ – but do expect your relative to parade his or her dog around in this umbrella contraption indoors. It was just too cute to wait for rain!

5) For the amateur alcoholic Philosophy the Cocktail Party (Set of 3)

You know the type – they brag about their newly found wine knowledge and think Jack Daniels is the be-all-end-all of scotch, but they can’t seem to make it out of the bar without spewing their lunch onto the sidewalk. Hand them this set of 3 luxury scented hair and body cleansers from Philosophy and let them indulge their addiction in the privacy of their own shower.

6) For the hypochondriacs among usTalking First Aid Kit from Intelligent FirstAid

No matter how many doctors they visit or medical tests they undergo, these anxious, sensitive types fear for their lives on an almost daily basis. A papercut on their hands is a fatal wound, a dull throb in their temples is most definitely a migraine, and an innocuous cough is a sign of the bird flu. Delight them with this Talking First Aid Kit and they will never have to worry about cutting too thin a piece of gauze again. Hooray!

7) For the someday novelist/literary snob Instant Gratification Kit from McSweeney’s

Ah, yes. There’s one in every family, and if you haven’t identified the someday novelist/literary snob in yours, rest assured he or she is hiding. These brooding writer types are known for leading double (sometimes triple) lives.  Handing them this Instant Gratification Kit from McSweeney’s (aka 4 issues of the famously weird literary journal) is a double-edged sword. On one hand, they’ll secretly wonder if you’re out to blow their cover, and will plot your demise in their heads. On the other hand, they’ll be so truly smitten with the idea that someone finally “got” them, they may just model the heroine in their first novel after you. Tough call.

DISCLAIMER: I don’t have a dog yet (we can’t decide between 4 Yorkies named after the Beatles or 2 pugs named ‘Fred and Ginger’), but besides the pet umbrella (and the Philosophy gift set because I prefer to drink my liquor), I’d love any of the other five gifts on this list. Hint, hint. Hint.


7 thoughts on “7 Wacky (yet Practical) Gift Ideas for the ‘Special’ People In Your Life
  1. Johnny Techno says:

    Go with the pugs. If you get the Yorkies, John and Paul will spend all day snapping at each other, George will quietly pee on the carpet and Ringo will lay around licking his balls.

  2. unhip wonder says:

    I would be the cat’s meow with a KCRW subscription card amongst my friends!

  3. Anonymous says:

    You already are the cat’s meow!

  4. flotsamjetsam says:

    Readers, make sure you buy these in numeric order. The BS button, and the K9 umbrella are 15% off with the KCRW fringe benefits card! Yes & No pillows still full price 🙁

  5. Dom says:

    I think giving a BS button makes you more of a douche than the person you are giving it to.

  6. TheGrinch says:

    Bahumbug! My agoraphobia won’t allow me to leave the house during the holiday season:) I’ll be doing my shopping online…thanks for the info.

  7. Ah, the BS button…Dom, you could be right. It’s all relative, though. Everything is relative.

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